Only in a rare instance will a Keithly buy a car that is not made by Honda and has a number of doors other than 4. Trucks and minivans are a different story, but there is a widely held belief among Keithlys that only bad things will happen to any other kind of car. While there is no consensus, some scholars and historians believe that this tradition started some time in the 80s when the current Chief Keithly, driving a 4 door Honda Civic stationwagon, was T-boned at an intersection. Despite the old Civic’s aluminum-can-like composition, the Chief miraculously ended up sitting in the passenger seat, unharmed.
According to the working theory, the Chief made two pacts with Honda that day: 1) to only buy 4 door Honda cars for the rest of his life and 2) never to wear a seatbelt again. To this day, he has violated neither of these pacts, with two notable exceptions: 1) a Mini-Cooper purchase to assuage a spouse’s frustration with the lack of walls in the house and 2) a $300 Chevy Lumina that some suspect he bought to provide the family with opportunities to mock the son that drove it and possibly to delay his marriage so that he could focus on earning a Master’s Degree.
Hondas have lived up to their esteem in Keithly history. The Chief later bought a 1988 Accord and drove it 300,000 miles only to have it stolen in 2002. That’s right, stolen. Another Keithly drove a similar Accord during high school that didn’t quite last as long, but most agree that if he had replaced the starter rather than push-starting it, it may have lasted much longer. When a Keithly has attained a higher status in the clan, he or she must purchase (or at least lease) an Acura, which is really just a fancy Honda. So great is the revere for Hondas among Keithlys that even the most frugal member of the clan once purchased a brand new 2009 Honda Civic Lx for over $20,000 even while using such money-saving tactics as living in a garage and eating eggs and refried beans for dinner most nights. There is also evidence that the eldest Keithly son’s decision to marry his spouse was influenced heavily by the fact that she drove an Accord, although it only had 2 doors.
According to the working theory, the Chief made two pacts with Honda that day: 1) to only buy 4 door Honda cars for the rest of his life and 2) never to wear a seatbelt again. To this day, he has violated neither of these pacts, with two notable exceptions: 1) a Mini-Cooper purchase to assuage a spouse’s frustration with the lack of walls in the house and 2) a $300 Chevy Lumina that some suspect he bought to provide the family with opportunities to mock the son that drove it and possibly to delay his marriage so that he could focus on earning a Master’s Degree.
Hondas have lived up to their esteem in Keithly history. The Chief later bought a 1988 Accord and drove it 300,000 miles only to have it stolen in 2002. That’s right, stolen. Another Keithly drove a similar Accord during high school that didn’t quite last as long, but most agree that if he had replaced the starter rather than push-starting it, it may have lasted much longer. When a Keithly has attained a higher status in the clan, he or she must purchase (or at least lease) an Acura, which is really just a fancy Honda. So great is the revere for Hondas among Keithlys that even the most frugal member of the clan once purchased a brand new 2009 Honda Civic Lx for over $20,000 even while using such money-saving tactics as living in a garage and eating eggs and refried beans for dinner most nights. There is also evidence that the eldest Keithly son’s decision to marry his spouse was influenced heavily by the fact that she drove an Accord, although it only had 2 doors.
1 comment:
Randomly, I was reading a friend's blog and was reminded of how entertained I am everytime I read yours. So, although I think I tried looking at your blog a few months ago and realized that you no longer had any time to do this in your life since the last post was in August- I was inspired to try again and am rather surprised to see that the day I look, is the day you post! LOL...once again, I have to smile.
I hope all is going well in your life!
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